WTAF?

How the fuck could this have happened? I’m sorry to swear so loudly and publicly, but really, what the actual fuck?

Really, how can my daughter be dead? Ella, Abi, Sally, all gone? It doesn’t make any sense. It cannot be.

How will we ever get our heads around this new life?

All the parents in the world that have lost children, killed, murdered, wasted by disease, how do we make sense of this?

I just don’t get it.

What a road to have to go down. Interminable sad road.

Here we are at the crossroads of our lives, forced to go down a road we never saw coming and fills me with horror and dread.

But we have no choice.

There are no choices in death.

There is choice though in how we go forward, what we do with the path we are given, how we step forward and what we do.

So many choices every single day.

I choose life.

I choose to honour her, to somehow survive her loss and live for her.

I’m going to choose that, every single day.