Welcome to
The Crossroads Blog

We all want to live well. But we all face crossroads.
What matters is how we respond
.

In my blogs you’ll find my responses to questions people ask me, real talk about life and loss, and reflections on navigating tough times with strength, honesty, and compassion. I cover both death losses and living losses too.

Not all posts are about grief. Many are about living well - my wider fascination has always been about how we can cobble together a good life, with meaning and purpose, fun and good times, hope and happiness, despite the inevitable tough stuff. My earliest blogs are raw, written years ago, in the aftermath of Abi’s death. Each blog has a theme label at the top and tags below to help you find more of what you’re looking for.

Over the years, I’ve learned that one person’s question is often shared by many - so if there’s something on your mind, please ask. I’m always open to exploring these topics from a different point of view, and truly believe the best learning flows two ways. You are the expert in your world and I’m here to learn from you.

I’m not into pretence or perfection. Just being human - like you - trying to piece together a life out of the cards we’re dealt. I’m proud to hear these blog conversations have helped many. I hope they help you too.

Lucy wearing a black and white striped shirt sitting at a wooden table with a laptop, notebook, glasses, and cup in front of her. Behind her, a wall decorated with colorful framed artwork and a bright pink sign that reads 'Accept the Good.'

Ask Me A Question.

Living Loss Dr Lucy Hone Living Loss Dr Lucy Hone

Lessons from Braided Rivers: Real-life Resilience

You can never truly learn a braided river - it shifts day by day. Life’s like that too. In this piece, I reflect on how kayaking New Zealand’s unpredictable rivers helped me let go of control, trust myself to make good-enough decisions, and keep going when the current gets rough.

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Invisible Grief Dr Lucy Hone Invisible Grief Dr Lucy Hone

Mother’s Day is Complicated

All week, people have been messaging/emailing me about how hard the build up to Mother’s Day is - all the promo emails advertising ‘gifts for mum’, and the endless radio ads designed for a life we either no longer live or never got in the first place. While I do get to celebrate (I assure you in a VERY low key way in our house) and I’m forever grateful for that - I’ve also lost my mum, and I miss Abi. As Sarah from Sydney wrote in an email to me, “why do we need a day that makes not being a mum even harder?” If this day is hard for you too, I wrote this for you.

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Death Loss Dr Lucy Hone Death Loss Dr Lucy Hone

What to Do in the First Weeks of Grief

We’ve just lost our precious daughter. My world has collapsed. What helped you get through this and keep living? I can’t imagine going on. I just don’t know what to do.

Greta from Brighton.

Oh Greta, I’m so so sorry. Every loss is different, and we all experience grief individually - but I can so feel your pain and how utterly unfathomable her loss is to you, her mother. Let me first say that you will always be her mum, and she’ll always be your girl. Not in the way you imagined, I know, but it’s the truth.

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Death Loss Dr Lucy Hone Death Loss Dr Lucy Hone

Waiting for My Brain to Catch Up

“What am I doing, lying here under this blanket, sleeping the afternoon away, missing life?” Just one of the many questions circling in my head as I try to grasp the permanence of Abi’s absence. A reflection from the early days of loss—waiting, watching, trying to understand.

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Living Loss Dr Lucy Hone Living Loss Dr Lucy Hone

The Last Term of Parenting As We Knew It

A bittersweet reflection on the final season of family life as it once was. On school shirts drying in the sun, toast at the kitchen bench, and how parenting is really just a long, slow letting go. A piece about memory, love, and the quiet ache of change.

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Death Loss Dr Lucy Hone Death Loss Dr Lucy Hone

Making Memories

We’re in beautiful Byron Bay. We were here the same time last year: same place, same scene, same glorious weather and long white beaches, only this year everything is tinged with the sadness of Abi’s absence.

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Death Loss Dr Lucy Hone Death Loss Dr Lucy Hone

WTAF?

How the fuck could this have happened? What the fuck?

Really, how can my daughter be dead? It doesn’t make any sense. It cannot be.

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Living Well Dr Lucy Hone Living Well Dr Lucy Hone

Why Old Friends Matter Most

Friendship isn’t a luxury. It’s one of the few things that holds when the ground gives way. So thank you to my oldest mates - for every effort, shared silence, and reminder that we’re not meant to do life alone.

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Real Talk Dr Lucy Hone Real Talk Dr Lucy Hone

A Lot of Love and Affection

A reflection on parenting, protection, and the privilege of being a mum—through the lens of music, memory and the people we miss. Inspired by one cheesy pop lyric that still says it all: love and affection, whether we’re right or wrong.

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